1) People have had larger families in smaller homes than mine.
(Ok, it actually sounded something like (in a high pitched ferver) 'I mean serioulsy Tonya! People have had BIGGER families in SMALLER spaces? Right?!')
2) (Again with ferver, but this time less high pitched as I was wondering where on Earth these words coming out of my mouth were coming from) 'The thing is, God has given us so much. Maybe I should just be content with what He's given me and quit whining about the rest.'
I took the hint (from myself? God?) and told Mike that God was changing me; that I was learning how to be content with what we currently had and that my eyes were starting to focus more on the now and less on the future.
So, instead of saving $40,000 for an additon and having to scrimp for ten years and never go on vacation, we spent $2,000 and redid our kitchen. It looks brand new. And with this minor remodel, we completely changed the look and feel of our entire home. And even though our kids are still sharing bedrooms, for some reason, the house feels, and looks, much bigger. I realized that with my change of heart, that with simply being content and working with what we have I actually got what I wanted. Sweet, right?
|Trust me, it didn't look nearly as nice two months ago.|
Then, a month or so ago while at my friend Emily's house, while eating her homemade scones and drinking her French pressed coffee, she said something that rocked my world. She simply stated that she had started looking at being a home-maker as her career choice, and once she did that, things started to change for her. Not in a real drastic way, but in subtle ways; making more homemade foods for example.
That really got me thinking. That night while taking a shower I told Mike what she had said and I told him that it really resonated with me and I wondered what that meant for me? If home-making was my "career" what kind of career choices should I be making? What kind of things should I be doing to better my career? How could I make myself more marketable? And Mike, in typical male fashion, asked me, "So, what are you going to do about it?"
That was it - the million dollar question.
I realized I'd slowly been making small changes up to that point already - such as baking and being content with what I had instead of always wanting for more (that's a work in progress by the way) - but I really wondered what the big changes were going to be.
Through a small series of events I realized a major change would be cancelling my Facebook page. I know that sounds silly. Really silly. But Facebook...that danged Facebook...ate up a lot of my time. So, it had to go. For two days I had withdrawls. How sad is that? No one knew what I was doing; I didn't know anything that was going on! Somehow, some way, I managed to survive, although it was weird going to bed without looking at my phone for status updates and for awhile I would stare blankly at our computer screen wondering "What should I even do with this thing?"
Then I made homemade granola for the first time. What a simple thing to do...simple, yet totally major. Making my own cereal?
So, besides canceling Facebook and making my own cereal (and bread, and donuts and brownies...wow. Carbs much?) I'm still wondering...What am I going to do? What can I do to make myself a better home maker?
I'm not exactly sure ... but I'll let you know as I begin to figure it out.